Winston Churchill once said, “When you are going through Hell, keep going.” Over the past three years, many of us have felt like we are living in a dystopian reality. I have often told my friends that I think I am living in the wrong parallel universe.

Flash back to about 5 years ago, and I was going through a very bad divorce with an abusive (ex) spouse. I had to file for bankruptcy because he financially ruined me (among other things). I had very bad PTSD. I basically had to start my life over, which, at times, seemed insurmountable.

As if that was not enough, I gained 30 pounds over the course of my first two years back in the Northeast. I was always slim, and then, I was the heaviest I had ever been in my life. I officially hit rock bottom. I thought I was a complete failure. As I look back, what I went through would have made most people crumble.

Was I scared when I was going through my divorce? I was terrified. During the hearing, I was so scared that I was trembling and had chest pains. I could not get enough water to keep my throat from feeling parched that day. This is something that is difficult to admit, but it is important for you, my readers, to know that we all have faced something that has scared us, but we had to go through. This was my Hell.

How did I get through all this? I was lucky to have the support of some very close friends and, my family helped me when I was at my lowest. When I was really ready to give up, I reached out to my father, my mother, and a very close friend. I was asking for help when I spoke to them.

With all this said, I got through it. If you read my previous blog, there were times I had to take things a day at a time, an hour at a time, or even one minute at a time. I utilized every resource I had that was available to me. I visualized what I wanted my future to look like. I also set some very specific goals. Every day, I worked toward making those goals a reality.

What kept me going? Faith, my daughter, courage, the instinct to survive, and the desire to thrive. I was not going to let my ex win. I reminded myself about how much my daughter needed me, how much I meant to my family and to my friends.

It Takes Grit

You may have heard that one of the many qualities that sets successful people apart from every one else is determination. Some people call it grit. What is grit? It is the combination of passion, tenacity, and perseverance. It’s the ability to work through a problem even though the road to obtaining the solution may be long and difficult. I would like to add courage to these successful characteristics.

Part of my job as a Pilates Instructor is to acquire new clients. As a matter of fact, before I became an instructor, I spent over two decades in corporate and consumer sales. In sales, you encounter a lot of no’s in order to get to a yes. You need to have a thick skin and understand that rejection is just part of the process.

In order for me to build my business, I still had to sell my services. I had to show prospective clients how Pilates and Personal Training can improve their health and help them reach their fitness goals. Did people reject my service offering? Of course they did. No’s should never be taken personally, and this is what sets most trainers apart from those who have a fruitful business.

To successfully reach your goals, you need to be brave. It is okay to have some fear. If you did not have this fear, you would not be normal.

If you ever get disheartened on the way to achieving your goals, remember why you wanted to reach that goal in the first place. Never lose sight of that reason.

Set Small Goals

For a moment, let’s focus on weight loss as a goal. Imagine that you gained 50 pounds, and you want to lose that weight. If you set that 50 pound weight loss as one singular goal, it can seem very daunting and almost impossible to achieve. In this case, it is better to set small goals that will lead up to the ultimate goal of weight loss.

Set multiple small goals. I recommend starting at losing 10 pounds first. This goal will seem a lot easier to obtain than 50 pounds lost. The other reason why recommend breaking down this number is because for every 10 pounds you lose, you will need to recalibrate your daily caloric intake limit. You will start out with a larger caloric limit, but as you lose the weight, this number will get smaller.

Fail means First Attempt At Learning

I am sure you have heard the phrase, “If at first you don’t succeed, try and try again.” Failure is an opportunity to get the bugs out of your strategy, whether it be an invention or personal goal. It is also a great way to learn for the better, although it may not feel that way at the time.

If you find yourself getting frustrated, take a step back from your endeavor. Take a walk, nap, meditate, or talk it out with a trusted friend or colleague. When you return to your effort, you will have a fresh mind where new ideas can more effectively formulate.

It took a few attempts on my part just to get this website up and running. There were times I would get frustrated and have to walk away from it to get a clear perspective. Ultimately, I managed to successfully design my site and publish it.

So, never give up on your dreams. Do not let one setback stop you from turning your aspirations into reality.

Thank you for reading!